My last article was on storytelling. That was one very close to my heart as it was based on my childhood memories. Just now I read something on how story telling is used by 1st nation people (original inhabitants of Canada) as a tool for disciplining their children.
When I was a Masters students I was blessed to have some of the most brilliant minds teach me, but what taught us more I feel is the fact that the bodies that held those minds were also homes to beautiful, caring, loving and sensitive hearts. Our teachers/ professors were simply amazing. The beauty also was each one has a passion and how that passion was used to make each lesson more alive and realistic. One loved dance, another drama, one spoke of relationships, another use of language and thus each class was not a paper taught, it was an enlightening discussion enriched with real life examples.
The beauty is that each one of those professors spoke of some common practices that should play bigger roles in child rearing. Stories and storytelling were a part of that list. At that point almost 20 years ago I enjoyed my lessons. Today I am living those lessons through my children and in my daily parenting journey, and professionally.
As a child I loved stories. Today I know my children love them. For those of you who think with age the children’s interest in this decreases I believe otherwise. My elder one is 9 and still loves his bedtime stories. I am nearing 40 and if someone was to tell me 1 at bedtime I promise you I will sleep better that night. We as professionals working with children always say stories are a way to connect with our children. They help in language development. They help us keep our history alive. They help us connect with other individuals. Not too far back in history of human development it is said that stories are a tool to teach children.
Stories that teach children socially acceptable behaviours are called social stories. Today I learnt that the 1st people have a treasure of stories that have been with them for hundreds, maybe thousands of years. It is through these stories that they discipline their children. Apparently they never shout on the children. They never give time outs. They never scold their children. They just have stories for almost all aspects of life. Some mistakes are pretty predictable as children grow. Actually most are. For example we all know that once a child moves around they like to explore. As they grow they like to do this more and more independently. The 1st people have a story about a sea monster that is told to children from a very young age to make sure that when they run and play independently they stay away from the water (they don,t need to worry about swimming as much as the temperatures are often -40 degrees). These stories are used mostly as a preventive and thus all children are exposed to them. Sometimes though they maybe used as a corrective tool also when they are shared after an incident has occurred. Often these stories are accompanied with role plays or small acts that are done with humour as the main element. The children begin to see the effect of their behaviour in such scenarios and tend to make the amends. The best part is that this has been happening for many many years and generations after generations of those children have grown up and become adults leading lives like you and me, thus proving that our parents “yelling” actually did not make extra changes in our lives.
The only thing I will say after reading multiple such articles and reports is that I wish I can amend my ways and instead of increasing my heart rate work on helping my children make their life meaningful.
Take care everyone.
Signed off by a parent who learns daily.
Ekta's musings 